Why You Need to Set Boundaries

“Boundaries define us. They define what is me and what is not me. A boundary shows me where I end and someone else begins, leading me to a sense of ownership….and freedom.”

— Dr. Henry Cloud

Boundaries are a lot of things….time, space, property, beliefs…just to name a few. I like the visualization of a fence around a house. That fence makes it clear what the boundaries of the yard are. There is a gate. As the owner of the property, I can determine who may or may not enter through that gate. Once a person is on my property, I can define what behavior is or is not accepted – for example – "Hey kids – stay out of the flower beds!" This is a reasonable ask right? Friends, it’s the same in life. We hold the rights and power to use boundary setting to create a healthier, more balanced life for ourselves and our families.

Let’s look at four areas we need boundaries in and why boundaries are important.

1. Physical

   Boundaries help us protect our bodies and our physical health by setting limits on what is acceptable in terms of physical contact, personal space, and safety. This also relates to our physical health!

2. Emotional

   They help us identify and communicate our emotions, needs, and feelings in a healthy and authentic way. Boundaries allow us to establish emotional limits, such as not tolerating emotional manipulation, disrespect, or toxic behavior from others. They also help us create emotional space for ourselves, allowing us to take care of our own emotions without being overly influenced or drained by others' emotions. This promotes emotional resilience, self-awareness, and self-care, which are crucial for our emotional well-being.

3. Mental

   Boundaries allow us to set limits on our thoughts, beliefs, and values, and to prioritize our mental well-being. For example, setting boundaries around our time and energy can help us avoid overcommitment, burnout, and stress, which can negatively impact our mental health. Boundaries also help us establish healthy communication patterns, where we can express our thoughts and opinions without fear of judgment or criticism, promoting healthy mental well-being.

4. Relational

   They help us establish and maintain respectful, balanced, and healthy dynamics with others. Boundaries allow us to set expectations, communicate our needs, and define what is acceptable or not in our relationships.

Boundaries are Life-Giving

Establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries is essential in various aspects of our lives. From personal relationships to professional settings, boundaries serve as a vital framework for our well-being and success. By setting clear boundaries in areas such as our time, emotions, personal space, and values, we create a foundation for healthy communication, self-care, and self-respect. Boundaries help us protect ourselves from being taken advantage of, prevent burnout, maintain healthy relationships, and uphold our values and beliefs.

Set the boundaries. Build a balance into your life. You are worth it!